Sharing with Sheffield

The theme of this column came to mind recently when I went through some personal disappointments and found myself crying over them. I have cried over many serious losses in my life, but not over some-thing like lost opportunity or regret. Where was the strength I thought I had! And while I chided myself for foolish behavior, the tears flowed. Big revelation; I felt better back in control, hopeful and ready for a second beginning. Conclusion? It is all right to cry – and that applies to men and women.

Misconceptions about crying is that it is a sign of weakness. Crying is stigmatized by both sexes. If she cries it’s because she is unstable or weak or seeks at-tention. If he cries he’s a wimp, a pansy, or not manly enough. These generalizations encourage both sexes to submerge and cover up their feelings.

People who ignore sadness, pain, insult, fear, even overwhelming joy and pride, cheat themselves of an important facet of life. Crying isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a sign that you are human and mindful.

According to an article in the January 2016 “Centenniel Quill,” crying has several positive effects:

Tears remove toxins that build up from stress.

Crying can elevate mood. It lowers a person’s manganese level. Manganese causes emotional disturbance: anxiety, nervousness, aggression.

Crying lowers stress. Suppressing tears contributes to high blood pressure, heart problems, and pep-tic ulcers – all stress-related illnesses.

Tears release feelings. They release negative emotions as well as happy, joyous ones. They drain the overflow, and create a more stable emotional state of mind.

Crying is therapeutic. It stimulates our brain’s endorphin release, the “feel good” hormones that act as a natural pain killer.

Crying helps you connect with others. Being vulnerable is the best way to connect with a partner,  friend, or group. The ones who matter will appreciate how up front you are.

Weeping helps you accept a loss. Losing a family member, friend, partner, or even a pet is one of the worst things a person can go through. Words often do not suffice. But time with dear friends and family do.

Some quotes on the subject:
* “Tears speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and unspeakable love.”

* “Tears are the words my heart uses to explain whenever my smile can’t cover my pain.”

* “Perhaps our eyes need to be washed so that we can see life with a clearer view.”

* “God didn’t promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, sun without rain. God did promise tears, strength, and good friends to give us com-fort.”

* “Ever had a memory sneak out of your eyes and roll down your cheeks?”

* “The deep sorrow or great joy that has no vent in tears may make other organs weep.”

* “When you were born you cried. And the world rejoiced while your mother shed tears of joy.”

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